Happy Birthday Sweetheart

I do not see you, nor do I feel you near me. But I know in my heart what you look like and how it felt when you were holding me in your arms.

Happy Birthday. I dream of a time when I can tell you personally.

Happy Birthday Sweetheart

I found this... I no longer have the heart nor the strength to write my own as I feel my life slipping away everytime I do. This does not mean I have forgotten, nor is the feeling gone, but that, feeling it as strongly as I do and not have it returned is a slow death that never ends...


When We Two Parted
by George Gordon, Lord Byron

When we two parted
In silence and tears,
Half broken-hearted
To sever for years,
Pale grew thy cheek and cold,
Colder thy kiss;
Truly that hour foretold
Sorrow to this.
The dew of the morning
Sunk chill on my brow--
It felt like the warning
Of what I feel now.
Thy vows are all broken,
And light is thy fame;
I hear thy name spoken,
And share in its shame.
They name thee before me,
A knell to mine ear;
A shudder comes o'er me--
Why wert thou so dear?
They know not I knew thee,
Who knew thee too well--
Long, long shall I rue thee,
Too deeply to tell.
In secret we met--
In silence I grieve,
That thy heart could forget,
Thy spirit deceive.
If I should meet thee
After long years,
How should I greet thee?--
With silence and tears.

familiar stranger...

A scent in the air made me stop. My eyes scanned the faces of strangers passing by and suddenly my heartbeat fails... I closed my eyes... could it be? And logic reasserted itself and told my heart, "be still, you fool! It is not him, it cannot be." I took a deep breath and opened my eyes and just promptly stopped on my tracks (again).

I must have swayed because the next thing I knew, he was holding my hand and asking if I was alright. Another deep breath on my part, trying to buy time to compose myself... Finally I found my voice and said I'm fine, thank you, slowly bringing up my eyes to meet his. I could not stop myself from staring. Had he not been a lot taller than I am and with light brown eyes instead of the usual dark ones, I think I would have fainted. For there he was, almost an exact replica of my one true love. The smiling eyes, that sweet smile... and that unique babyish scent that tickles my senses everytime he came near. I must have turned white as a ghost. He led me to a bench and sat me down. Again I thanked him... He gave me some water from his backpack and sat down next to me, introduced himself and asked again if I was okay.

I said yes I'm okay all the while thinking how could I be, when you are there sitting next to me, reminding me of someone I've always kept at the back of my head. He smiled and introduced himself (again). I really must have been staring because he asked if he reminded me of someone. My wits must have left me because I actually said yes, of someone from a distant past. Then it was his turn to look at me... he said very gently "try not to let this accidental meeting be overshadowed by sadness from the past, remember that each life that crosses our path has a purpose and must be welcomed with gladness."

Shock is too mild a word to describe how I felt when he said that. More so when he said he'll buy me lunch to make up for the shock he gave me.

Lunch was good, in fact, if it were not for the fact that I kept staring at him, lunch would have been great. We talked like we were old friends. For a while it felt like I was thrown back in time. I smiled. He smiled and thanked me. When I asked what for, he said for really smiling.

All too soon I had to leave. He said, "you never told me your name, but that's okay. You have mine." He gave me his number and I gave him mine... along with my name. And we both smiled. As I walked away I took one last deep breath, held it and savored that scent that brought him to me. Will he call? Maybe. Will I? Most likely not. But I am glad to have met him.